There are three types of problems that an individual can encounter.
- Mine
- Someone Else’s
- No one’s
My Problems
These are problems that I have created, either directly or indirectly. They are problems that have occurred due to my action or inaction, and therefore are completely in my purview to fix. They are, however, also the most difficult to fix. Why? They often require me to change my perspective or my thinking, and that can be quite a challenge.
Occasionally, I perceive my problems to be someone else’s. When that happens, I’m forced to step back and consider. If my next brilliant idea falls flat on it’s face for example, I’m just as likely to think the idea must have been flawed as I am to think no one understood it and therefore they are all idiots. The reality is that it’s a combination of things that caused it to fail, but that list doesn’t include “they’re all idiots”.
Someone Else’s
Given the above discussion, the definition of someone else’s problem should be clear.
The challenge with these problems is that I often make them into my problem. If someone around me is having a bad day, I might make it my goal to fix it for example. Helping others is nice of course, but making their problems into mine is not helping anyone. In the end, I can’t fix their bad day – only the person having the bad day can fix it.
No One’s
These problems are the ones that occur day to day and that no one can do anything about. Death, tornado, earthquake, and the like. There is nothing to be gained by struggling against these things, yet many people worry about them on a regular basis. True, we can do things to predict them, slow them or in other ways impact them, but in the end they will and do occur. I believe that struggling against them is futile and a waste of effort.